Well hello again.

It's been ages... ages and ages and ages. And even now I can make no promises that I'll continue writing after this entry. But I'm optimistic. You know why? Because I write when I'm excited about stuff (and it's been a long time since I was really excited about life). But I'm excited about this.

Drum roll please....

I'm going to film school! Tada! Well, I hope I'm going to film school. It's a YWAM school and it's expensive (cheap for a film school but still). I'm going to have to raise a bunch of money for it... but I'm cautiously optimistic that the money will come in.

I know film school seems really random but when I think about what I enjoy doing in life and the skills God has given me I always come back to communication. I toyed with the idea of teaching (I do love it) but it never settled well. I thought about becoming a photographer but it seemed to static. I could never be a writer because I'm too much of a perfectionist.

And as I was thinking about it, I realized that one of the most powerful mediums of communication today is film. From full-feature to documentary to TV it's the art of the "moving pictures" that tickles our brains the most. I've spent years traveling and speaking on human trafficking and have seen how film impacts people; I can talk all I want but it's when I show a clip or a movie that it really hits home.

And speaking of human trafficking, I am stepping out of the field for a while. I have had a really great eight year run and need to do something different for a bit. As you know, trafficking is a heavy subject and to be quite honest, it finally got to me after all these years. I desperately need a change of scenery. I don't see pursuing film as something off-track with my desire to end human trafficking but it's just another step along the way.

And I'm not leaving YWAM. I've heard some people are confused about it:

I'm still in YWAM and the film school is part of YWAM's University of the Nations (uofn.edu).

I don't know what roll I want to have in film-making; I hardly know the industry at all, but I think it may be a good fit. I love photography, I love telling stories, I love bringing people into an experience. I'm also good with projects that have a beginning and end and I'm not too shabby with a computer either. Aaaand I can catch on to technical stuff fairly quickly.

So here's to a new direction in life! One that I'm excited about and want to share with people. I hope, hope, HOPE that I'll discover I have a knack for something in the film industry. Directing? Producing? Writing? Editing? Being a grip? Holding the boom? Running the dolly? Working the crane? Being an assistant to an assistant of the assistant (aka making Starbucks runs all day)? Ha. I have no idea.

What God's been saying...

I've  felt during the past few months that God has been asking me what I want to do with life. He left the door so wide open that it was really stressful, actually. I kept asking God what he wants me to do... and he kept saying, it's up to you.

It's a little tough when God trusts your judgement to make a good decision. I'd rather he just tells me straight up... because, well, it's easier to be a robot than to be a human being. It's easier to be a slave with a master that dictates your every move than have to deal with the complexities of making a good decision and taking responsibility for it.

So here's to not being a robot.

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